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0101.2020

Image by Dung Tran from Pixabay

Happy New Year 2020! I wish everyone peace and wholeness this year forward.

While so little has changed in our physical space from 23:59 the year before to 00:01 the next year (today’s magenta sky looks similarly tantalizing with one of yesterday); and the concept of weeks, months, years, etc. is the way it is mainly because of organizational reasons (I mean, why do we have seven days in a week and not, I don’t know, nine and a quarter?), I still find today pretty awesome.

At least it gives a mental ground to my mental space (a.k.a. my mind) that allows me to have a better re-starting point. Well, you can restart your mind anytime (if one can control his/her mind – and not the contrary), but when the whole world decides that January 1st is the day, then maybe I can somehow squeeze myself with them in affirmation too. I guess it helps to have the imaginary chapter of 2019 closed and the one of 2020 opened, and imaginary seven billion people imaginarily kicking my butt to stand up and start writing (also meant literally, ha) in the new chapter.

Back to my imaginary chapter of 2019: it has been a very, interesting, year. (Interesting is the word you mostly use when you don’t know what to say.) Lots of opportunities were in-store, one in particular that sent me to Berlin for two years, but also very present challenges I am still trying to overcome, mainly about finding my sense of purpose and the feeling of belonging.

From the sound of it, seems like the next posts of this blog are going to be more about mental space than physical ones. Sorry for the sudden drift, but believe me it’s not easier for me either. Coming from a field of study which is mostly in favor of materializing ideas into a concrete form that one can touch and step on, this topic is new and somehow foreign. I can imagine blocking the winter wind from coming into my room, but it is more challenging to block negative thoughts from intruding my ‘mental’ room. How does this room even look like? Does it have to look like something at all?

This attempt to understand the awkwardly shaped mental room of mine, however abstract and redundant it may seem, may actually be the most important knowledge I will ever need. Referring to an older post in this blog (http://ruangdalamkata.com/2018/07/a-take-on-the-world-and-something-about-acceptance-too/), my look on this will determine how the world looks like, and if I don’t understand it right, so will the world remain a place too fuzzy for me to comprehend and live in.

I can’t promise that the upcoming post will be exciting to read though, not even to myself. I can’t even promise to write at all. But now I (kind of) know what I need to do, and having that knowledge may be the first necessary step. In the word of my mental room, maybe I have found the door.

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